Products T-shirt Stock Certificates (Temporary Out of Stock)

The T-shirt
We're delighted by the smiles we get from total strangers when they see us in our T-shirts.  "Wow.  Did you really lose $100,000 on Internet stocks?"  This T-shirt isn't like all the others you have cluttering the back of your closet. T-shirts are made with IllumiNITE, a special process that makes clothing look ordinary during the day but at night the material reflects any light that shines on it, such as automobile headlights.  Fun and safe, too.  Great for kids. T-shirt Buy It
View Shopping Cart/ Checkout Stock Certificate*
Testimonials from Happy Stock Certificate Owners
Just like a real dot com, does not have a product or service of sufficient value that customers are willing to actually pay for it.   Many dot coms are designed as entities for marketing stock to speculators -- sometimes called "investors" -- without a chance of generating profits.   Some manage to go public and use the currency thus monetized to buy real companies to put together into a possibly viable business after the fact.  But not  Our only products are stock certificates.  Like the real thing, they're works of art!
Want to jump in but don't want to get burned?

Seems like everyone's getting rich off Internet stock speculation... except you.  Want to get into the Internet stock mania but don't want to pay thousands of dollars for real Internet company stock that's likely to become worthless?

You can't lose... much.

Now you too can enjoy the thrill of owning an uneconomical Internet company's stock certificate without fear of losing all your money.  Buy an Stock Certificate.  Not only does not have any assets, revenues or profits, it doesn't even exist.  Of course, some Internet companies won't exist either after the Internet stock speculative mania ends.

"History doesn't repeat, but it might rhyme." - Mark Twain

When automobiles were new technology, you could buy stock in hundreds of car companies with names ending in "Motors" or "Motor Company" or "Car Company" just as you can buy stock in hundreds of Internet companies with names ending in .com today.  American Austin Car Company, Durant Motor Car Company, Chief Motors Company, Star Motor Company, Olympian Motors, The Reo Motor Car Company... all gone.  Investors who bought shares in these companies lost their money.  The unfortunate "buy and hold" investor who bought the 100 shares of American Austin Car Company stock below at the top of the market lost an equivalent of $107,050.18 in 1999 US dollars.  The good news for the person who bought the stock certificate at a yard sale for, say, fifty cents many years later is that it's now valued at $149.95 as an antique.  Some antique stock certificates go for $2000 or more.

* An Stock Certificate does not assign shares of a registered corporation nor represent a security in a registered corporation.  It's a novelty.
American Austin Car Company
1929 Cost @ $113/Share peak price: $11,300*
1999 share value: $0
Current value as an antique: $149.95
*$107,050.18 in 1999 dollars, CPI adjusted
Zero Shares
1999 Cost: $9.95 Common/$49.95$29.95 Preferred
1999 share Value: $0
Future value as an antique: Who knows?

Sales Notices

Notice: April 3rd, 2006

Sorry, iTulip Stock Certificates are temporary out of stock. 

Notice: June 13, 2000

The dot coms are down for the count.  When we first started selling Stock Certificates in early 1999 for $49.95, you had to pay more than $90 for a share of At Home (ATHM), one of the companies on the Internet bubble watch list.  As of July 26, you can buy a share of ATHM for $15 1/16.  Now that you can buy a real share of real Internet company stock for less than the price of an Stock Certificate, looks like we have to get our prices in line and slash the Preferred B Stock Certificate from $49.95 to $29.95. 

Notice: August 16, 2002

We sold out of Series A preferred in 2000 and started printing Series B preferred in 2001.  Each preferred series stock run is limited to 200 units.  The serial numbers of the Series A preferred ran from SN#00001 to SN#00200.  The Series B preferred stock certificates have serial numbers ranging from SN#00201 to SN#00400. 

Own a Piece of the Internet Stock Mania Action, Cheap
Two Kinds of Stock Certificate
Preferred BSeries
Common Series

Click to Enlarge

Click to Enlarge
Each Preferred B Stock Certificate is unique and customized just for you.  We are printing only 200 Preferred B Certificates, so you'll need to hurry to get in on the Series B "Round"
  • Name(s) you supply
  • Unique serial number
  • Date of issue US$29.95 List (Out Of Stock)
All Common Stock Certificates are identical to the certificate made out to
  • Alan Greenspan
  • Serial No. 000001
  • Dated January 1, 2000

  • US$9.95 List (Out of Stock) Preffered B Stock Certificate Buy It Common Stock Certificate Buy It
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Both types of StockCertificate are printed on authentic stock certificates from Hobbs and Warren, Inc., Legal and Municipal Stationary in Boston, Massachusetts since 1858.   If you buy stock in a company from the Boston area the certificates are usually printed on Hobbs and Warren stock.  The Stock Certificate features an official embossed seal. Stock Certificates "Preferred B" "Common"
Printed on authentic stock certificate blanks from Hobbs and Warren, Inc., Legal and Municipal Stationary, with official embossed "corporate" seal
Printed with the name you specify (yours or a friend's)
Alan Greenspan
Printed with a unique serial number
Printed with unique date of issue
January 1, 2000
List Price
Buy It
Buy It
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Possibly your best long-term Internet investment
Get a "Preferred B" Stock Certificate with an early issue serial number before the Internet stock mania ends and Stock Certificates are flying outa here like stock brokers from a high rise window. 

You can purchase a "Common" Stock Certificate for US$9.95 or a unique "Preferred B" Stock Certificate for US$29.95 plus US$4.00 shipping in the U.S., $5.00 to Canada and $8.00 international. 

You will receive by mail an authentic Stock Certificate like the one displayed above except bigger and made out of molecules rather than bits.

A unique gift for that friend of yours with his or her life savings in Internet stocks
  • Get one for yourself
  • Get one for yourself and a special friend
  • Get one for everyone at the office
  • If for any reason you aren't happy with any product, you can return it within 30 days for full refund.

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    We ship to anywhere in the world.

    Questions about ordering?

    We are serious about customer satisfaction.
    If you have questions, fax them to 781-402-1793 or send e-mail to
    Or call us at 781-402-1790

    After all that slick marketing, you're still not ready to get one of these soon to be valuable (maybe) beauties?  Sheesh!

    Then please take a moment to vote in our Instant Customer Feedback Poll. Click on Current Results below to add a comment.

    Instant customer feedback
    I will buy an Stock Certificate if...
    ...the price is lower
    ...I'm sure it's really well made
    ...Alan Greenspan has one
    ...Cher Bono has one
    ...I can sell it for $14 million like Dave Barry


    Instant Customer Feedback Poll